Values driven behaviour is the essence of mental toughness.

It’s easy to know you want, but how many of you get stuck in the sticky layers between knowing what it is you want, and actually getting it? 

This often happens when we get caught up in our emotions and our thoughts, and lose touch of our values.

We call this emotion-driven behaviour.

Emotion driven behaviour is when we behave based on how we’re feeling in a moment to satisfy our need for short term comfort at the cost that which will serve us long term. 

When we are emotion driven, we struggle to adapt to life’s demands and reach our goals. Here, ideas of who we want to be and the life we live exist as nothing more than ideas. 

When you commit to acting in alignment with your values (values-driven behaviour), rather than your emotions (emotion-driven behaviour) life starts to work FOR you, not against - you start to live out your desires and create the life you want to lead. 

HOWEVER, there’s a catch.

Aligning with your values can be pretty damn uncomfortable, hence why we are more often than not, driven by how we are feeling rather than what’s important to us. 

For example, my emotions may tell me to avoid something that’s hard so I don’t have to deal with being rejected, failing and ultimately, hurting. This emotion driven behaviour makes life easier and comfortable in that moment - short term.

Long term, nothing has changed and I’m still light years away from where I want to be and who I want to be.

Now I feel even more lost, anxious and distressed. 

Can you see how this cycle of emotion-driven behaviour can lead to unnecessary suffering? 

Alternatively, I could align with a value I hold deeply: courage. What does that look like in action, as a daily habit? 

Trusting that I am resilient enough to handle it, asking for help, being prepared and using the skills I have to step outside of my limiting thoughts and feelings. 

Is aligning with courage easy? 

No. 

It’s uncomfortable, but this willingness to experience discomfort in pursuit of what’s meaningful to me is necessary if I want to live a meaningful life. 

SO, when you are struggling to align with your core values, it can be helpful come back to the mother of all values:

A willingness to experience discomfort in pursuit of what is important to you,

and knowing that sometimes aligning with your values is going to be hard, but that risking a little discomfort is part of living a meaningful life and ultimately, getting what you want. 

Take a moment to consider what it is you value. What emotions and thoughts get in the way of what’s important to you? Are you willing to experience a little short term discomfort in pursuit of those values?